How I tried to convince my husband to have children

Interior Spread

“My mom was 22 when I was born. I’m 27 now. And I have no kids. Everybody has kids. But I don’t. 

My husband is the reason why I have no kids. We didn’t talk about kids before we got married. He says, mothers are dumb. And that I will ruin my life if I get pregnant. I didn’t know I’d need to convince him. We talk about it every day. But I can’t change his mind. 

But I want him to be a father. I surround him with kids pictures. I hang them everywhere. So that he starts liking them. I got old family albums from his parents. To show he was a kid too. Once. 

I keep a diary. I record all discussions. I’ll put everything in a book. And I will give it to him. And it will convince him. I know it will.“

The project “How I tried to convince my husband to have children” is built around the creative dialogue of a woman with her husband making the case for and against having children. I always dreamed of becoming a mother. My husband always offered rational arguments against the idea. His biggest argument is that women run the risk of turning into housewives if they become mothers before establishing themselves professionally. Eventually we decided to make a playful agreement: if I would manage to establish myself as a photographer, my husband would agree to have children. I attended a photographic master class of a Magnum photographer Alex Majoli, where I conceived the project about my dream of becoming a mother. The project has now been completed in a form of a photo book. I use my personal diary notes, photos I have taken of other children and happy families, archive photos of my and my husband’s parents, recordings of personal conversations with my husband. The book is constructed as a visual diary of a person whose life is focused on one goal: to have a baby. Between each page there is a photo of the contraceptive pill package, slowly becoming more and more empty. The idyllic love story (I started dating my husband when I was 18 and married him when I was 20, subsequently moving with him to Switzerland) grows into a more dramatic struggle between the rational arguments of the male and the irrational feelings of the female.

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